Peter Pan

TiiN said:

Hi all, I can remember that someone worked on adding a hologram of Count Dooku to the deleted senate scene of episode 2 (and speaking to the senate). I thought this was in this thread but I can’t find it anymore. Maybe someone can help me?

I think I took it down because it turned out too convoluted and incomprehensive. However, if you are still interested, I could upload it again.

You would also have to imply that Jango purposefully planted the dart, which leads the Jedi to Kamino.

A while ago I suggested inserting a closeup of Jango holding the dart after his meeting with Zam. It’s a little change, but it would emphasis the importance of the dart and hint at a greater plan.

Semester holidays are coming up in two weeks, so if nobody responds until then, feel free to send me a PM.

Darth Tremor said:

Though I still like the idea of Palpatine using lightning on Vader to make him submit to the dark side, it would add gravitas to Vader’s line, “you don’t know the power of the dark side! I must obey my master.” You would then understand Vader to basically be saying, “I obey or die,” that he lives under tyranny.

However that is something that could be achieved, or at least hinted at, through fan editing. There is a moment after Anakin’s turn, before Palpatine tells him to rise, where we cut away to Yoda feeling the catastrophe through the force. One could add Palatine raising his hands and shooting Anakin with lightning just before the cut, continuing the sound effect through Yoda’s moment, add an evil laugh for the atmosphere and return to palatines office, where Anakin thanks his new master. This would retexture the function of force lightning, not just as a weapon but as a tool for control and dominion, essentially like a burn sign. It would show how Anakin is broken after his betrayal. He is paralyzed by his dependence on Palpatine, induced by his fear of loss. Furthermore he might very well want the punishment as a mean to numb his conscience, after all he just unleashed the ultimate horror on the galaxy.

I think something like that could serve the function of reinforcing Vader’s line in episode six, unless I misread your meaning here.

On an unrelated note. It just occurred to me, that Anakin’s redemption, which is essentially tied to the birth of the twins is ultimately dependent on Obi-Wan winning their duel on Mustafar.
That does not fit with an redemption arc, because it is no conscious decision to do good, which would signify hope for him. Instead it is his overconfidence to get the jump on his former master, which allows Obi-Wan, the droids, Padmé and by extension the twins to escape.

Darth Tremor said:

I would have him fall trying to prevent the take over of the Sith, that he is not Palpatine pal, but is seduced when Sheev kills Jedi Masters in front of him and damages Anakin with Force Lightning; that its the burns from The Emperor’s bolts that makes Anakin have to don the mask and black mantels. That would make it poetic in ROTJ that he dies being hit by bolts again.

I like the link to episode 6, although I wouldn’t try to recreate the exact scene.

Instead I would change the platform scene before the duel on Mustafar. In this version Anakin doesn’t choke Padmé after Obi-Wan’s reveal, but attacks him with force lightning, Obi-Wan defend himself with his lightsaber, but the rebound attack hits Padmé. Anakin is devastated, he is now at his lowest point, he wants revenge, Obi-Wan must die. But first Padmé needs medical help, however neither Obi-Wan nor Anakin can leave, so Anakin lets go of Padmé and allows 3PO to fly her out, thus opening the door to his redemption. On board the ship Padmé hands 3PO the coordinates to Bail’s asteroid base. They leave the system and the duel begins.

What do you think?

Yesterday all of us at home sat down and gave ROTJ another rewatch, due to the anniversary and I had an idea. I think the emperors arrival should be postponed until after the rebel meeting and Yoda’s twilight, in both scenes the Emperor is mentioned and his power and significance to the Rebel attack are underlined. It is the perfect build up to his introduction.

Great work, the trimmed dialogue works a billion times better.

Jar Jar Bricks said:

The music cues are absolutely brilliant. Nicely done.

What exactly is wrong with “Your need for victory, Anakin, it blinds you”? I took it to mean that a fight still isn’t over even though an opponent is disarmed. Seems like a valuable lesson for a Padawan, but it could be interpreted in a way that he is being too harsh on him and “holding him back”.

The way I understand it, the end of the fight will remain clunky like that unless it’s reinstated.

The problem is that Obi-Wan ends their match by doing precisely that, disarming his opponent.

Good point Octorox and I have to agree with you Jar Jar Bricks that it could add much needed substance to Anakin’s frustration in the context of an extended edition of the theatrical movie.

On the other hand I think that their antagonism towards each other bears the movie down and should be cut or greatly reduced, because it makes both character unlikeable. I mean it is hard to think that these two are friends, let alone brothers, and this scene does the opposite of reinforcing that belief.

The insert shot does the job I suppose, however I still despise the attitude Obi-Wan is giving Anakin. He is basically blaming Anakin for wanting to win their training duel, but behaves like a child that lost a game and insist on playing on until they have won themself.

In my opinion the Obi-Wan deepfake doesn’t work at all, the portion around his eyes look twice as big as the should.

My birthday

A montage like that would have to go right after Qui-Gon’s death, to match the emotions. And ideally we could add in some shots of Padmé’s team and the pilots failing their respective quests as well.

Edit: The question is whether you would want to cut away from this moment though.

He could mention that they were experiencing trouble with a tribe of sand people, the last time he spoke to her.

In my head canon they brought 3PO along to negotiate with them, but being the insensitive piece of scrap metal that he is he insulted the chieftain and made everything worse.

I wonder if we could add a line to AOTC that indicates that Anakin was staying in contact with Shmi through Palpatine, possibly without the knowledge of the Jedi. It would explain Anakin’s strong friendship with Palpatine and Anakin would already harbor a secret from the Jedi, long before his relationship with Padmé.

Thankfully we can dub Palpatine during their scene in AOTC without paying attention to lip-sync due to the lighting of the scene. However I struggle to splice together a conversation that works.

Maybe with an AI voice or a talented voice actor something similar to this could work:

Palpy: “…and so they have finally given you an assignment. Your mother would be proud.”
Anakin: “Have you spoken to her lately?”
Palpy: “Last I heard of her was two months ago, she told me Owen proposed to Beru, they are getting wed next year. Oh and your droid is continuing to scold about the jundland winds, hehe, she wanted me to ask you how to deactivate his vocal unit … It really is a shame that the Jedi won’t let you talk to her.”

Eyepainter said:

Peter Pan said:

Give Jar Jar agency, like this:

“Naboo has no Queen, Naboo needs no Queen”, the line of the Queen is broken, instead elected monarchs rule the planet. The last of the royal bloodline roams the swamplands of Naboo. To the local residents he is known as Strider, but to the people of Minas Theed his name is Jar Jar, son of Jam Jar. He is found by Qui-Gon the Grey, after the invasion of the ring-ships. They seek help from the Gungan, who retreated to Gunga Deep, intending to persevere the attack of Dooku the white, ringmaker (yes, he would replace the Viceroy). After they made their way to Minas Theed the parody falls flat, so they destroy the ring (-ship), Jar Jar is crowned and Qui-Gon the Grey returns to Coruscant.

Don’t forget Anakin Baggins. Without him, Jar Jar would not have gone very far.

Now that you mention it, Sting glows blue… And loses his finger (amongst a number of other body parts) and he throws something evil down a deep chasm.

Give Jar Jar agency, like this:

“Naboo has no Queen, Naboo needs no Queen”, the line of the Queen is broken, instead elected monarchs rule the planet. The last of the royal bloodline roams the swamplands of Naboo. To the local residents he is known as Strider, but to the people of Minas Theed his name is Jar Jar, son of Jam Jar. He is found by Qui-Gon the Grey, after the invasion of the ring-ships. They seek help from the Gungan, who retreated to Gunga Deep, intending to persevere the attack of Dooku the white, ringmaker (yes, he would replace the Viceroy). After they made their way to Minas Theed the parody falls flat, so they destroy the ring (-ship), Jar Jar is crowned and Qui-Gon the Grey returns to Coruscant.

I wanted to break up the tension there, because it should feel more like two friends having a good time. But I get what you mean, it sticks a little bit out, because their movement and position in the room doesn’t match that well with the rest of the scene. A bit like Anakin teleporting through the garage during his confession to Padmé.

I think we shouldn’t cut after Qui-Gon’s death, this plotline is problematic because it has two consecutive low points, but if we go from Qui-Gon’s death directly to Obi-Wan falling in the pit, we end up with one big low point that we can pair up with Anakin stranding inside the control ship and Padmé being captured.
It also adds a bit of dramatic effect, because had Qui-Gon lasted only for a few seconds longer, Obi-Wan would have joined him against Maul. With this order we can also place Obi-Wan bisecting Maul before the destruction of the control ship and Gunray’s capture, thus placing the moment of triumph last, followed by Obi-Wan attending to Qui-Gon.

However we would lose Anakin restoring hope through his destruction of the control ship, in its place we would gain a cool cut connecting the scenes stylistically, if we go from Obi-Wan killing Maul with a green saber to the green lights in Anakin’s cockpit replacing the red.

All in all it should play out like this:

1.-10. the same as Eddie proposed, that works really nicely, I think
11. Continue the Lightsaber fight into the force field room (maybe the most jarring cut, because the fight essentially jumps from one level to another with only a short establishing shot between them)
12. Anakin joins the space battle (same as Eddies point 11)
13. Lightsaber fight continues, Qui-Gon is killed, Obi-Wan screams and just as Maul turns around to face him, the force field opens. Obi-Wan fights aggressively, but is thrown down into the pit by Maul.
14. Padmé and her team are captured and brought before Gunray (I think we would need another shot bridging the two scenes)
15. Anakin enters the droid control ship but is stranded
16. Maul taunts Obi-Wan, the later grabs Qui-Gon’s saber through the force, jumps out of the pit and bisects his opponent
17. Anakin restarts his ship and destroys the control ship
18. The Gungans are freed and we see how the droid army collapses.
19. Add a shot or two of collapsing droids to the throneroom scene, the Naboo pick up their weapons and the Viceroy is captured. Our heroes were victorious,
20. but Qui-Gon fell in the struggle, Obi-Wan knees besides his dying Master and promises to train Anakin.

I don’t like how Obi-Wan is a total dirtback in this scene. First he loses, then he lectures Anakin, claiming that his need for victory is blinded him, only to fight on until he is victorious. If anyone is blinded by a need for victory in this scene it is him and not his apprentice, who fought more aggressively, but fair and unlike his master, showed some decent sportsmanship after the fight.

So I recut the scene to fix this. I also trimmed down Anakin’s aggression, so that their duel feels more like a friendly game. Apart from that I tried to stabilize some shots and match the colors to AOTC. I also stretched the footage vertically to make Anakin’s face look a little slimmer and slightly adjusted Anakin’s voice in the beginning.

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1ZTKua5rx4h2pdeotFPaJ_bA5Isa50bLl/view?usp=share_link

To me, only the first one feels like a self contained movie and only because we have the Tatooine stuff to bind the narrative together.

The Hologram is there to throw a bad light on Padmé and Dooku is there to show that he has nothing to do with Jango’s actions.

Peter Pan said:

Good idea, it actually references “the mistake of Naboo”. I think the whole scene will take a while for me to complete, but the audio is mostly finished. The only thing still missing is Dooku introducing himself, but I could upload what I have so far.

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1Mqt9MeF9mr08sP-wQAHjMqGHJSuidcuf/view?usp=sharing

Finally got around to finish the scene. I must say I am disappointed in how it turned out, granted some of the masking is a little off, but the bigger problem remains and that is the quality of the original footage.

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1OMsP2KD0VSQV9rX3FQLquF_wAg55q8Ve/view?usp=share_link

The idea with this scene was to lay the ground for an edit that pushes the Kaminoans and the droid founders into a more active role. They hire Fett to disturb Padmé’s work (not kill her, explaining the stupid bugs). He also purposefully sets Obi-Wan on his tail, which will be emphasized by adding a shot of him preparing the toxic dart after meeting with Zam. Dooku and the separatist will play a more reactive role, they will only acquire the droid army as a reaction to the rising tension with the republic, much like padmé predicts during her meeting with he queen.

Moulin Rouge!
Lawrence of Arabia
Dr. Zhivago
We Are No Angels
In Bruges
Princess Mononoke
Knives Out
Murder on the Orient Express (not the new one)
Dr. Strangelove
Hot Fuzz
Life of Brian
Schindler’s List
Rocket Man
Shape of Water
Dead Poets Society
Amsterdam
The Life Aquatic
Fantastic Mr. Fox
Last Duel
LOTR

Anakin Starkiller said:

Oh right, there’s another one already. I forgot cuz it didn’t stick around on the first page long.

Anyway, what about non-SW focus threads? Would those be viable?

I agree with G&G-Fan, it would have to go into the “fan edits and projects for other properties” section. Thematically I would like to see a thread on LOTR edits that try to match the books more closely.